Wide Awake but Dreaming

Slip into my thoughts and do watch your step


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Emotions Across the Ages

Taking a moment here, thinking about the day ahead.  I was suppose to get a lot of writing in yesterday, but that notion was sabotaged (or do you say, “sabotagged”?) because of all the IMs I got yesterday.  I tell you, people are gabby.  They want to know how you’re doing all the time.  Which is really good, since a lot of the issues I’ve been having of late have do with people just not seeming to give a shit.

Really, though, I was able to get some writing in between bouts of sending off IMs.  In the last three days, even with all the crap going on at the moment, I’ve knocked out probably fifteen hundred words for Part Eleven of Diners at the Memory’s End.   The story is really wearing me out, to be honest.  I so want to get through it and get the story told.  I know I’ve spent a lot of time getting this story written–part of the stress I’m feeling probably has to do with the fact that I’m just plodding through this damn thing.  I mean, I do five hundred words, and all I can think is, “Damn, you could have done better.”

I need to stop being so hard on myself.

It’s an interesting scene in the story right now, because I have Cytheria using her abilities to tear up dummies like nobody’s business.  She tore the arm off one dummy, and snapped the legs of another, right as she was freezing the hell out of both.  If they’d been real people, she would have been in the process of freezing them to death before messing them up by shattering and ripping them up.  Yeah, she’s a mean girl.  She has reasons to get rid of her stress, but still:  she’s going to be a bit surprised by her actions when it’s all said and done.

The following parts are going to make for an interesting  transition, as they tone things down considerably.  It’s all about talking and working things out.  It’s all about coming to an understanding of what happened, and what will happen.  it’s all about coming together, finding common ground, and developing a solution that works for everyone.

It’s also about not letting Cytheria go on a rampage and rip another girl to shreds, and I don’t mean verbally.  This isn’t Mean Girls stuff; this is more like Jean Grey going all Phoenix on some girl’s ass, and leaving a smoking husk of a body behind when she’s finished with her ten seconds of hard work.

It’s not even close to being fair.  And she knows it.

In a way I love writing this part.  Never mind the stuff I’m going through:  poor Cytheria has to deal with emotions she’s never felt before now, and given that she could lay waste to any number of people were she to put her mind to it–yes, fear her, because she is all powerful!–she knows she can’t just go off on a rant and slap someone if she gets upset.  ’Cause, lets face it, said slap could take a person’s face off if she wanted that to happen.

Good thing she doesn’t have laser vision, or crap could get very serious.

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