The last year has seen me getting sick a lot more than I’d been in the four years before that. When you’re not in contact with people day after day, you avoid those viruses that will bring you low. When you get back to the work force, however, you find those little bastards have been waiting for you with a glee in their non-existent eyes . . .
I’ve had at least three colds since getting back to work, and the worst was over last summer, when I had a respiratory infection that decided to stick around for two months. I had trouble breathing, I had trouble sleep, I had trouble just getting through the day. It wasn’t in any way fun, and for a while I thought I was going to lose my mind because I was suffering from extreme exhaustion.
Near the end of January I caught something that started to lay me low before I kicked it back. Then, a week later, it tried making a comeback, and I manged to beat on it a little more even though I ended up having to take a day off. I thought I was over that . . . until yesterday.
Early in the morning I felt the sore throat coming on. Before I left for home I felt the fever coming. By the time I was home from work I was burning; I don’t know what my temp was, but I was up there. I hurt all over, my sense of time passage was way off . . . yep, fever was on, and all I could do was med up and hope for the best.
I didn’t sleep much last night, and though I feel a little better, I’m sweating like mad and suffering chills off and on. My head is very wibbly-wobbly, and I’m certain I’m going to need a nap before the day it out. Maybe I’ll even need to run to the store to pick up some medication, because I’m almost out.
Needless to say, I didn’t write last night. Couldn’t write was more like it; the head was all over the place and my fingers were comfortably numb–so much so it was hard for me to even feel the keyboard. It was all for the best, because there was no way I was going to do anything that would have made sense. Not to mention when I’m feverish my sense of time passage goes right to hell, and I probably would have thought I’d been writing for an hour when the reality would have been more like ten minutes.
I wrote stoned a couple of times, and while it seems a good idea at the time, what come out on the other end was pure, unfettered crap. Nothing I’d typed made any sense, and it was at that point that I decided that while I might be able to write with a bit of a buzz on, no way I was going to producing any kind of work I’d be proud of when I was too far gone to be unsure I could walk a straight line.
It’s like that when I’m extremely sick. The body and mind are telling you to stop whatever the hell it is you want to do, and just rest. So I rested.
Today is another day. Lets see if I can get back into my work–
And not feel guilty about not writing due to being incapacitated.