An Annoying Holiday Interlude


Let it be known that I actually have someplace I need to be going in about an hour and I got to get ready.  So even though I have a post that’s in the process of being readied, there’s no way I’m going to get it out the next half hour.  Therefore, I’ll just tell you that I have it out later this afternoon, and I hope I’m not too loaded that the post comes out in a semi-coherent fashion.

Because what day is it?  I’ll let Benifer answer that one:

Catch you all later.

Up the Lift There to the Third

To get directly to the point, no I did not finish the scene last night.  Last night was the Transgender Day of Remembrance and I attended that, going out to stand in the windy cold–it was both–to stand at the vigil and to be one of the official readers.  I also was interviewed for television, but I haven’t seen the video yet.  I’ll let you know if that happens.

After that I went and got something to eat and then headed home, arriving back at the apartment about 8 PM.

The night is dark and full of spoilers--or something like that.

The night is dark and full of spoilers–or something like that.

I did manage to get in about four hundred words but that was it: I simply didn’t have it in me to write everything out.  But I will get it done tonight, and I will start on the next scene.  You can trust me on that because I’m telling the truth. Mostly.

In the meantime our intrepid students are nearing their final destination.  So why do we catch up with them and see what’s happening.  I will start with an acute observation from Annie’s and Kerry’s friends:


(The following excerpts from The Foundation Chronicles, Book Three: C For Continuing, copyright 2016 by Cassidy Frazee)


Everyone once inside the left and waited patiently as the doors closed. Seconds later they were heading towards the third floor and the partial openness allowed them to see the city beyond.

Penny leaned toward Kerry sniffed the air. “Hey, have you been drinking?”

Kerry put on a sheepish grin. “Just a little.”

“Whoa.” Anna sniffed the air near Annie. “You’ve been drinking, too.”

“Just a couple of glasses of champagne.” She wrapped herself around Kerry’s arm. “It was our anniversary, after all.”

They traveled the rest of the way in silence. Moments later the lift came to a halt and the doors open, allowing everyone to file out. Annie went to the window and saw the Champ de Mars below which instantly told her they were on the southeast side of the tower. She nodded toward the flight of stairs leading to the observation platform above: Kerry and she followed everyone else to the next floor.


Yeah, kids: your friends notice it when you been drinking champagne because it makes smell of a bit.  But neither of the kids have any shame about it because it was their anniversary.  Anyway, why should you be ashamed?  You can bet all the other kids would be drinking if they had chance.

Now the interesting point about the Eiffel Tower.  There are actually two parts to the third floor: is the part where the lift arrives and then there’s the viewing platform directly above this floor.  One of the great things it was done a few years ago was Google took the Google Trolley into the top floors of the Eiffel Tower and did a walk around, which essentially was the same thing as doing a street view on the platform.  If you put the little street view guy on the Eiffel Tower and you managed to snag either the second or third floor, you’ll actually be able to go between the floors with an elevation marker on the lower right-hand side of the Google screen.

Which means when the lift arrives this is what the kids see:

Looks more like sub.

Looks more like sub.

the descent leads back to the lifts; the stairs on the right lead to the viewing platform above.  If you look at the window on the left you’ll see the view that Annie was describing of the Champ de Mars, which means are sort of looking to the southeast–and you know that because you can see the EST marker above the Descent sign.

So we headed up the stairs and we see this:

Sorta see this.

Sorta see this.

That’s the same view as the one in the picture above, and you can tell it’s so because the stairs are there to the right.  At one time this used to be all open: there was the railing and then there was nothing but a lot of open sky around you.  Of course it all got caged in once people realize that a nine hundred foot fall was great way to kill yourself, and no one wanted to turn the Eiffel Tower into Suicide Central of Paris.

"Come for the View; Leave by Jumping" isn't a good slogan for a place like this.

“Come for the View; Leave by Jumping” isn’t a good slogan for a place like this.

And with that we have everyone at the top and conversations begin–


The view was spectacular. Here, two hundred and seventy-six meters above the park below, the temperature was pleasant and the wind nonexistent. Annie encouraged everyone to spread out and take the time sightseeing, as the third floor was open to Foundation personnel until two. With that said, she took Kerry’s hand and gently guided him towards the north side of the tower.

Once out of earshot of their fellow students Kerry glanced over at Annie. “Why didn’t you tell me you came here after our A Levels were over?”

“I was afraid if I told you I’d come here you would’ve been upset.” She looked out over the city for a few seconds. “I told you, I don’t want to feel as if I’m bragging because my life so much—”


“I was going say different.””I know it’s different and I accept that.” Kerry stopped and told Annie close to him. “And by now you should know I don’t care. I know your family has money; I know you have money. Just like you know that matters to me.” He gently pressed his finger against the tip of her nose. “This is what’s important to me—”

“My nose?”

Kerry laughed aloud before turning and walking with Annie toward the north side of the tower. “Touché. You got me with that one.” They stopped just past the Bar A Champagne and gaze down upon the magnificently illuminated Palais de Chaillot. They both gaze upon it in silence for nearly twenty seconds before Kerry turned and kissed Annie on the cheek. “I’m sorry.”

Taking hold of his hands Annie turned to face Kerry. “Why are you sorry?”

“Because I been acting so weird of late.” He wrapped his arms around Annie and held her close. “Letting all this personal stuff it between us and—”

“And nothing.” Annie locked eyes with her soul mate. “We’ve already discussed this and it’s behind us. There’s nothing for which you need to apologize.”

She rested her head against this chest. “We have plenty of other things with which to keep us busy.” Annie released a long, slow side. “This is not going to be an easy year.”


First, here’s where Annie and Kerry are having most of their conversation:

Yep, right there where the platform turns.

Yep, right there where the platform turns.

It’s great view, no one can argue that.  It can also be windy up there, but just like there was almost no wind when kids were up there was almost no wind when I was up there in 2006.  I didn’t have a conversation with my significant other, however, about how they were able to get up to the top of the Eiffel Tower after we met: I was first time for all of us, those in my family.  Kerry didn’t care if Annie visited here without him; as he says, he knows Annie’s life is different from his.  She’s done so many things already, most of them things he’s only dreamed about doing.  But give him time.  The kid will eventually get around the world with his Bulgarian Buttercup.  I mean, there’s only so many cities you can visit in each novel.

Now something just a little special.  I’ve been going on for several excerpts now about how I visited Paris in 2006, and how I went to the top of the Eiffel Tower.  So I’m going to do is show you something I’ve rarely ever shown, and those are pictures taken from that location.  Now, I did not want to include pictures of myself, nor did I want to include pictures of my significant other, so what you going to get our pictures that include my then seven-year-old hammy daughter, who at that age really took to the camera and loved being photographed.  Every so often in these pictures, however, and you’ll get a glimpse of a blue tee shirt; that’s me, hiding just off frame.  No, you don’t want to see that person.  Even I don’t want see that person.

Here we are fresh out of the tube station and heading toward the Eiffel Tower by way of the Palais de Chaillot:

The same place where that German paperhanger snap his photos.

The same place where that German paperhanger snapped his photos.

And here we are on the second floor:

See how relaxed she is with nothing but 400 feet of air behind her?

See how relaxed she is with nothing but 400 feet of air and another platform behind her?

We got one looking up from the second floor to our final destination:


Yes, we’re heading up there.

Finally we get to the top and wouldn’t you know it, we snap a picture with the Champ de Mars in the background:

That place certainly gets around.

That place certainly gets around.

And just to prove that we also visited other Parisian landmarks, here’s a picture of my daughter posing in front of the Moulin Rouge:

Being totally French.

Any moment she’s about to burst into song.

And getting her picture taken with a few the famous gargoyles at Notre Dame:

These guys didn't talk, which means Disney lied to me again.

These guys didn’t talk, which means Disney lied to me again.

There you have it: photographic evidence that I have been to Paris.

Now all I have to do is end this scene and get my kids out of Paris–

It’s My Party…

Well, that didn’t turn out the way I expected.

Needless to say things did not go as I had wanted.  By about eleven thirty I knew what was going to happen, so I left the party I was at and walked home.  I didn’t cry walking home: I was already cried out by that time.  I pretty much knew what to expect when I woke up, but what I didn’t expect was the state that I worked so hard to keep blue had flipped in the middle of the night.  Yeah, that’s not a good feeling.

So I’m sure there’s going to be a lot of people who are thinking this is going to be the bees knees and things are going to get back to the way they used to be.  And that’s what really bothers me: things will get back to the way they used to be.  I’m old enough to remember how they used to be–and they weren’t all that fucking great.  Particularly if you are white, male, or Christian.  Well, at least I have one of those properties covered…

I don’t have any answers.  I know a lot of people are going to try to frame this as the common man doing away with the political establishment.  What is really going to turn into is a lot of hate, a lot of misery, and a lot of turning back the clocks to get rid of things that some of us fought for fifty years to put into place.  It really makes it hard to be optimistic about the future when you think about this, because to me, this is really nothing more than the last grasp of the Angry White Man trying to get back felt was his.  And now that it seems that they’ve got it, shit is likely to get real dark in the next few years as they struggle to hold on to it.

Are we going to see a rise of the protests we had in the 1960s?  Going up against the newly militarized police that we have, these could turn and real bloodbaths.  I don’t know if that’s going to happen: too many people have gotten use to hashtagging their protest because it’s a hell of a lot easier to do while you’re sipping a latte at Starbucks.  I missed out on all the protest of the 1960s and 70s, but I damn sure remember them.  I remember people getting shot; I remember people getting teargased.  I’m not sure if this generation’s up for that sort of thing, and I know my generation’s too goddamned old for that.  But who knows: maybe I still have something left in me.  Maybe, at my age, with my suicidal impulses, I won’t give a shit if I get shot protesting for rights I shouldn’t have to protest anymore.

This was supposed be a happy day for me.  Today was one year ago that I change both my name and my gender marker.  I was really looking forward to the future living out my life is personal and supposed to be.  Today, who the hell knows?  I know I’ll make it until my daughter’s graduation, because I want to see her graduate.  After that, though?  We’ll see.  I’ll see if it’s worthwhile going on.

They say it’s darkest before the dawn, but I think this because a lot of people have things turned around due to getting off of Daylight Savings Time.

Right now everything seems dark to me.

Finally Settling In: The Worry

Well, yesterday was interesting as was the night.  Tonight will likely be even more interesting since last night I was asked to work the desk by the door and not only do my phone bank calls, but set up people coming in to do phone banking since I already know the routine.

I am The Gatekeeper: are you The Keymaster?

A photo posted by Cassidy Frazee (@cassidyfrazee) on

Yeah, I’m just full of comments, aren’t I?

Yesterday we saw Annie and Kerry check in, but at least Paris isn’t like the Hotel California and they’ll be able to check out after checking in.  And now Kerry is relating a dream he had of them where Annie is in–how do I say it?  In a family way?  But there’s more–


(The following excerpts from The Foundation Chronicles, Book Three: C For Continuing, copyright 2016 by Cassidy Frazee)


“Really?” Annie was somewhat happy that Kerry wasn’t looking up as he spoke, because he couldn’t see the surprise she knew her face registered. This is the first time he’s ever mentioned us having children. I’ve brought it up a few times, but he’s only spoken of it after I have. “What happened in your dream?”

He looked up and alternated his glances between the wall directly in front of him and Annie. “We were going out someplace, I’m pretty sure of it. I know I was wearing something nice, maybe a suit: I’m not sure. You were wearing this metallic blue dress—it was gorgeous.I also noticed that you had shoes to match.” He chuckled. “I caught that right away.

“Anyway, I’m in a bedroom fixing my tie and you walk in. You were putting earrings in and you walked right up to me, so I couldn’t help but notice—” Kerry placed both hands in a semicircle about eight centimeters from his own belly. “You had a bump.”

Annie couldn’t keep the smile off her face. “A baby bump.”

Kerry nodded. “Yeah. I have no idea how far along you were, but there definitely was—” He placed his left hand on Annie’s belly. “You had one of our little witches in there.”

She seemed pleased with this news. “And how did I look?”

He finally turned to look at Annie and when he did, there was a light film of tears in his eyes. “You were beautiful: you’re always beautiful.” Kerry turned away as he sniffed. “I don’t think there’s anything that could happen to you, or anything that you would wear, that would make me see you as anything but beautiful.”

Whenever Kerry became emotional like this, Annie found it impossible not to fall even further in love with him. She knew that she was the center of his world just as he was a center of hers, but no matter how many times she heard Kerry describe her in various glowing endearment, whenever he described her appearance something inside her heart seemed to seize and she grew light-headed. Just as I want to hear him say everyday that he loves me, I love it when he tells me that I am beautiful.

There was something about his crying, however that bothered her. She touched his chin and turned his face toward her. “My love, what’s wrong?”

Kerry cleared his throat twice and sniffed back tears once before answering. “Annie, do you think—” He sniffed once more. “—do you think there’s a chance I’ll treat our children the way my parents treat me?”


Notice how Annie is really kinda chill about the idea that one day she’s not only going to be a wife but a mother as well?  Then again, she decide she wanted to get married about the time she was six, so why should we be surprised?  Once more you have to wonder where this is leading…

"Hey, Kerry?  This book on visions says dreaming about your girlfriend being pregnant before you marry is...  Hey, do you like big families?"

“Hey, Kerry? This book on visions says seeing your girlfriend pregnant before you marry is a sign of… Do you like big families?”

I’m sure Annie will be a lovely person while pregnant and never once turn into a raving she-devil full of crazy hormones lashing out one moment and crying the next.  I also gotta wonder if she’ll be given something to keep her from using magic during this time because damn, that could be bad.

Lastly however, Kerry is losing his shit over the possibility he’ll end up like his parent and turn into a cold, unfeeling person.  We know why he’s feeling this way but Annie doesn’t, so you can rest assured she’s gonna have something to say about this…